Devin Pugliano

what does the guy from “cannibal corpse” say in that one song where he’s growling?

i test pens.  if they seem out of ink… i writer harder…if they are completely out of ink…do i throw them away?
no…instead i keep them…only to be bothered by them later.

flies in the room always tend to be drawn towards me.
i feel this is because i’m italian.
or…because i don’t shower.

i weigh 160 lbs.

all of a sudden angelina jolie has seem to have lost her sex appeal.

i encourage theft from large corporations.
especially department stores.

i can’t remember the last time my piss was actually clear.

i believe one should always have a black light handy.
you never know what you’re putting your face in.
“i have an extra pillow and blanket for you in the closet.”
not so fast…

yes, they make you look fat.

charles manson should be released from prison.
thousands of murderers, pedophiles, rapists, etc. have been set free after serving less sentences throughout the years…
what did he do, really?
corrupted a few weak individuals?
well, so did this supposed, “jesus.”
and he’s been ignorantly & blindly worshipped for thousands of years.
at least manson can play the guitar.

i used to think waitresses worked hard.
i came to my senses…

i wonder what kind of porn tom from myspace watches.

“i kill the bus driver”

lose the attitude.
strung up by your legs, a knife to your throat…
you’d beg for your life just like those that you feel are “beneath you.”
your little, arrogant, paris hilton poses make you look ridiculous.

the new slipknot song sucks.

i can’t remember where i get most of my bruises from.

the best ramen flavor?
chicken.

verne troyer has a sex tape?
i wonder if i have a vcr small enough to play it.

her full 34c tits ended up looking like pancakes by the end.

fat people disgust me.

myspace “trains” are for losers…
why does a 15, 16 or 17 year old nobody on myspace need 50,000 friends? lol

self-taught musicians are usually far better than those that are trained.
and more deserving of their accomplishments for that matter.

i hit “refresh” far more than one should.

notice how when someone dies…
everyone was all of a sudden their “best friend” when they were alive?
lol
the dude or chick probably didn’t even like you…
more often than not…that’s the case.

ugly black women are uglier than ugly white women.

even though i no longer smoke…
“lucky strikes” have always been and will always be the best cigarettes

half of you wouldn’t stand a chance with me.

i no longer have a license.
i refuse to ever have one again.
as of last year, i will no longer drive.
gas / danger factor / price of upkeep & the price of a car itself?
none of it is worth it in the end.

only the first 4 metallica albums were any good.

i can honestly say i’ve never measured my dick.

ghosts aren’t real.

without makeup i’m more than convinced that 90% of you would be revolting.

i am on 10 mgs of lexapro
100 free pills every couple of months.
ah, having the “hook up”

how do you say, “fozzie bear” in ebonics?

the smell of rain…

hey, let’s all deny sisters the right to get to know one another because we’re all so insecure and pathetic…

whenever alcohol is mentioned in a stand-up routine…
people cheer…
why?
“let’s get drunk and possibly pass out and possibly get raped.”
“let’s get drunk and get behind the wheel and kill a family.”
“let’s get drunk and drown in our own vomit.”
“let’s get drunk and go home and beat our wife & kids.”
“let’s allow our generation to continue the tradition of being a statistic.”

i’ve only broken one bone: a toe.

whatever happened to that kid from “cop & a half?”

i am obsessed with serial killers.
i probably shouldn’t be…
but i am.
i don’t mourn for the victims or their families.
without them there would be no entertainment.
your daughter died for my primetime joy.

all of these blogs will most likely be printed off and used against me at some point.
ah, freedom of speech.

“fievel goes west” was the shit.

my newborn is part black…
instant street cred…

girls that say they aren’t sluts…
generally are.

enjoy aids…you’ve earned it.